Too much....too early

The other day I woke up to find my son two inches away from my face starring intently into my eyes. Wait...let me back up. My son is 3 years old, he talks constantly, and frankly, knows way too much for his age (and of course...I love him like crazy). It's common for him to ask random questions but I was totally caught off-guard by this one. He frequently sleeps in my room on a small blow up mattress at the foot of my bed (ok really, it's every night but I can't break the cycle cause I'm too tired to get up and deal with it). So, on this particular morning he had climbed up in my bed after Carlos had gone to work and was starring at me. I opened my eyes and nearly jumped out of my skin (have you ever had that nightmare where you wake up to find someone starring at you with a knife poised above your head...yeah, not cool). I slowly realize it's Talmage and what's that he's saying? "Mommy, Mommy" I answer him "yeah" and with a look of real thought in his eyes he says to me "Mommy, what are you doing with my life?"
My mind starts working..ummmm...can this be happening at 7 in the morning, and wow, did he really just ask that. Not wanting to give a bad answer or an answer that would invite more questions (I was tired..come on) I thought a little more (Talmage still starring at me thoughtfully). I got it....I smiled back and said "I'm just trying to make you happy"
"oh. ok." he says and jumps off the bed. You've got to be kidding me, IT WAS JUST ANOTHER RANDOM QUESTION. It's not like he really cared or understood the meaning behind the answer and here I was left to consider what I had just said when all I really wanted was sleep.
Carlos and I often discuss Tal's future. We both agree that what we ultimately want for Talmage is for him to be happy ( finding happiness is a whole other blog for me). We don't care what he chooses for a profession or where he chooses to live, we just want him to be happy. Not some superficial happiness, but complete happiness. With so many paths to follow and so many things to choose from today, it is hard sometimes to see that happiness comes in and through Jesus Christ, his example, and his teachings.

Guatemala

Guatemala

Never have I felt so connected to a different place and people. The feelings I have about guatemala are so strong that most people dont understand them. The pictures I see, the things I recall almost always bring me to tears. What I felt and saw when I was in Guatemala nearly 8 years ago remains vivid in my mind, as if I was actually still there trapped in the moment. The picturesque landscape of Tikal is surreal. To actually walk through ancient Mayan ruins is exhilerating and at the same time deeply spiritual. I often find myself trying to re-create in my own life the feelings of peace and beauty that I found in Antigua. One of the greatest experiences of my life was boating across Lake Atitlan with volcanoes rising from the shoreline on everyside. Silence and serenity overtook me, I could hardly take it all in. The majesty of it all took my breath away. My life has been influenced so much by the small country. The creation of Guatemala was a masterpiece.

Simplify

I've always been one of those people who expresses themselves best through writing. It's only fitting that I should finally start a BLOG. With a little help and encouragement along the way from friends and family I have finally entered the blogging world with absolutely nothing profound to say!
There are so many possibilities here. I suppose I could fill up space by telling insanely funny stories about the things my son does and says (which I'm sure you'll read about almost everyday). I could write about childhood tragedies that I've suffered (like everyone else). I could write about sick and twisted things that sometimes go through my mind (like everyone else). I could give some counsel or write down my thoughts (kinda boring) or I could just be straight forward and typical and write about myself (which would be no fun at all).
So here it goes...ready? Something really deep....
Keep it simple.